Abusive relationships are frequently represented in physical terms — but not all material abuse and the potential for violence indicate a dangerous relationship. Emotional abuse happens when one person in the relationship tries to control the other person. They do this by using verbal assault, intimidation, and emotional manipulation to make their partner feel bad about themselves. The victim usually knows that something is wrong, but they are too scared or ashamed to speak up. This blog post will discuss ten signs of emotional abuse in relationships so you can recognize it if someone you know is suffering from it!
What is Emotional Torture in a Relationship?
Emotional torture is the primary symptom of an abusive relationship. Emotional torture is the result of a partner’s uncontrollable anger, and it often goes unnoticed.
Emotional abuse is one form of domestic violence. Although emotional maltreatment does not always entail physical violence, psychological terror may lead to bodily harm in a relationship. Emotional abuse is also known as mental or psychological abuse.
Emotional abuse refers to any wrong, abusive behavior that does not involve the body. When a pattern of conduct is repeated over time, a relationship becomes emotionally abusive. One or two conflicts maybe just a poor brawl. However, several events form the basis of an abusive relationship.
Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship
An emotionally abusive relationship might be more challenging to detect than a physically abusive one. However, there are specific indicators that you should look for when attempting to discover an emotionally abusive relationship.
Controlling Behavior and Jealousy
The first indication of an emotionally abusive spouse is their controlling behavior and jealousy. They perceive their possessiveness as a good thing. This jealousy, on the other hand, might become controlling behavior like:
- Restricting contact with friends and family members.
- Expecting you to answer texts and calls, even if you’re out hiking or working out
They accuse you with no evidence of cheating.
They may try to influence you by controlling your money or access to items you require. This is more common in relationship interactions where one person works, and the other does not. Emotionally abusive partners may restrict your access to money so that they know exactly what you’re up to. They might also prevent you from going to places or talking with people they don’t like by restricting your access to a car or phone.
Frequent Angry Outburst
It’s natural for couples to raise their voices occasionally, but it’s unhealthy when conflicts frequently escalate into screaming. It’s especially worrying if you’re afraid. When you argue, it makes a good discussion nearly impossible and establishes an imbalance of power—only the loudest voice is heard.
Gaslighting and shifting blame
The term “gaslighting” refers to a kind of psychological abuse in which an emotionally abusive partner attempts to undermine your self-confidence and beliefs. Emotionally abusive partners may, for example, cast aspersions on you for their harmful conduct. They may unjustly accuse you of making them angry and for how they treat you. Gaslighting is a manipulative practice that involves refuting facts, lying, and invalidating your reality, as well as making accusations of paranoia and claiming that events that didn’t happen happened.
Emotional manipulation is another sign of an emotionally abusive relationship. An emotionally abusive partner might employ a variety of strategies to influence their spouse. They may threaten suicide, self-injury, or violence against others if you attempt to terminate the relationship at its most severe level. They may also put you in fear of blackmail. This behavior is frequently an attempt to prevent you from leaving.
They might say things like, “If you love me, I’ll let you do anything,” or, “I want to make sure that if we’re together, it’s because we wanted each other.”
Emotional abuse is defined as the exploitation of another individual’s emotions for personal gain. Insults, humiliation, guilt-beating, and putdowns are some examples of emotional abuse. If the other individual constantly deprecates you and makes you feel insignificant, you’re probably in an emotionally abusive relationship.
They might say things like, “I’m the only person who can put up with you,” or, “You’re just a downer.”
Lack of Care and Concern
An emotionally abusive partner is not concerned about your feelings. They may ignore them altogether when they get angry at something else that bothers them—even if it has nothing to do with what’s bothering them. An emotional abuser frequently finds excuses for their hurtful behavior by claiming one reason after another until there are too many reasons to list. This might prevent you from resolving conflict peacefully by preventing you from communicating constructively. No matter how hard you try, all of your efforts appear to be wasted in repairing anything.
Isolation from Family and Friends
Emotional abuse is common. It has a detrimental influence on all aspects of your life, including your family and social interactions. Being cut off from loved ones is one of the most visible indications that you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship—the abusive individual attempts to gain control by restricting the other person’s access to support. Abusers frequently persuade their victims that no one cares about them. Victims may feel alone and disconnected from loved ones and previous versions of themselves due to this isolation.
No Personal Space
In emotionally abusive relationships, partners are not allowed to have their own lives or friends outside of the relationship. They don’t see any need for personal space and frequently intrude on your privacy as a way to control you.
They might say things like, “I’m going out with some friends tonight,” then suddenly get angry when they find that you made plans without them knowing about it first.
Emotional withholding is a term that describes the punishment of one partner’s emotions as a way to control or manipulate them. This behavior frequently creates resentment and anger, which may lead to physical abuse in some cases. The abusive person may emotionally punish you for expressing yourself by entirely withdrawing their love when it is most required.
They might say things like, “I’m not talking to you until you stop crying,” Or, “If I can’t have fun with my friends, then neither will you.”
You Live in Constant Fear
If you’re terrified to be or breathe in the same room as your spouse, then you may be in a mentally abusive relationship. In these relationships, the power dynamic is skewed. One partner tends to make all the decisions and may frequently utilize their emotional imbalances to intimidate others. Excessive worry about what people think of you is one of the most prevalent symptoms of emotional abuse. You might feel doubtful about yourself, have a loss of clarity about yourself, and be chronically anxious or depressed. Walking on eggshells is also an indication that something has gone wrong.
How to Deal With an Emotionally Abusive Relationship
The first step toward overcoming an emotionally abusive relationship is to acknowledge it. If you can identify any form of emotional abuse in your marriage, it’s critical to note it first and foremost.
When you are honest about what you’re going through, you may begin to reclaim your life once again. Here are seven more strategies for regaining control of your life that you can start using right now.
If you’re living in an emotionally abusive relationship, then you must prioritize your wellbeing and happiness. If not for yourself, then do this for the people who love and care about you. Don’t allow other people to hurt or abuse you—especially when it comes from someone who claims to love you truly. This is perhaps the most crucial thing that anybody can recall if they want to make sense of their relationships with others.
Reach Out to Someone for Help
Although it might be challenging to express how you’re feeling, speaking up can assist. Speak with a friend, family member, or even a therapist about what you’re going through. Take frequent breaks from the abusive individual and spend time with people who care about you.
You’ll feel less lonely and isolated if you have a network of excellent friends and confidants. They can also tell the truth about your life, which might be beneficial to you.
Don’t Blame Yourself.
You may believe that something is wrong with yourself because of what has happened in your life, but this isn’t true. It’s not your fault if someone treats you badly or abusively, and it certainly doesn’t make you less lovable as a person. Remember that no one ever deserves abuse from another individual, whether they are their spouse or otherwise too. You don’t have to confront an emotionally abusive relationship alone! If necessary, seek professional help and support elsewhere so that things can start getting better for you again before long too.
Work on a Safety Plan
Emotional abuse, while not as harmful as physical abuse, is nevertheless dangerous. Emotional maltreatment can eventually lead to physical violence. Create a safety strategy that includes saving money and preparing where you’ll go and how you’ll get there if the situation becomes physically hazardous.
Final Note – Rebuild Yourself after Emotional Torture
While it’s critical to know what you want, don’t forget who you are while leaving an abusive relationship. It’s never simple to face your mistreatment, but this isn’t the time for self-criticism. Developing self-assurance in your abilities should be something to be proud of. Value yourself and recognize your bravery—both during the event itself and afterward. Most significantly, you can overcome any difficulty, no matter how severe it is.